I pause over that word whenever I read it. I pause over
it because I know it's a powerful concept. Home. The place where we are
formed, the place where we are protected, the place where we are loved.
Where is home for you? Is it where you grew up? Is it
where your children grew up? Is it where you live now or is it somewhere
else?
I used to say that "home is where my suitcase is." I'd
moved so often that I couldn't name any one place as home in the sense
that most people think of home. My parents refer to Wisconsin as home,
even today. It's where they grew up and where much of their families
still live. But Wisconsin was never really home to me.
So maybe I pause over the word "home" because of a
wistfulness that longs to have a place to call home.
But where did Jesus go when he went home? Was it to
Bethlehem? or Nazareth? or is heaven his home?
Mark suggests that to Jesus, home was the town of
Capernaum (Mk 2:1 and other places). According to tradition, it's not
the town in which he was born nor the town in which he grew up, but the
town into which he moved as an adult. It became the base for his
ministry, a place to which he returned, a place where he found love and
security.
It also seems to be the place where his family is, for
it is here that his family comes to seek him. In an honest effort to
help him, they come after him to take him away from the crowd. Jesus has
become so involved in his ministry that he has forgotten to eat. "In a
culture where meals are rituals and food is scarce, anyone who refuses
to eat must be 'out of his mind.'" And so his family responds as if this
is a crisis. They come as loyal advocates seeking his well-being.
It's their love and concern for Jesus, their desire for
his safety and health, that brings his family to his home. Their intent
is to take him away and make him rest. He needs to take a day off and
relax, and so they come to take him by force and take him away from the
crowds.
Home, then, may be where your family is. It's not
necessarily a place, but a concept of love that's lived out in a
particular setting.
But Jesus all but ignores his family. He refuses to go
out when they call to him. He indicates that those around him are more
important than family.
Last week during our final class in Disciple Bible
Study, Jack proposed a thesis that family is an Old Testament
concept, a Jewish value; not a Christian one that is rooted in the New
Testament. He pointed out that most of the positive references to family
in the New Testament were quotes from the Old Testament and that there
is a remarkable amount of anti-family teaching in the Gospels and in
Paul's epistles.
This is one of them. In another place, Jesus is quoted
as saying, "anyone who does not hate his mother and father" (Lk 14:26)
cannot be considered a Christian. In yet another place, Jesus says that
he came to bring a sword "to set a man against his father, and a
daughter against her mother" (Mt 10:35).
Ouch.
As I have read and studied this past week, I have found
it hard to refute Jack's thesis, much as I would like to.
What does this say about our focus on family? What does
it say to those who are trying to make family and family values a
political rallying cry?
What is the purpose of family? What is the value that we
find in it and how can we claim that value within an authentic,
biblical, Christian perspective?
Historically, the family was primarily an economic unit,
providing for the food, shelter, and clothing of the family members. The
family often included children and parents as well as aunts, uncles,
grandparents, and cousins. The larger the family, the more secure the
future. Many times, families would group together for the same reason.
Jesus was perhaps pointing out that economics are not
the primary motivations for relationship. As such, the family of his
time was ill-advised.
As near as I can tell, the industrial revolution changed
the basic understanding of family to mean primarily the nuclear family
of children and their parents. There have been exceptions, but for the
most part we belong first to the family in which we grew up and then to
the family in which we are the parents. Economics is no longer the
primary definition nor purpose of the family simply because single
people can survive in the industrial age without the financial
assistance of children or parents.
In the latter half of this century, then, family has
struggled with identity and purpose. We have come to think of family as
the primary institution in our society, but we're not sure what it is
and we're even less certain about it's purpose and meaning.
In Hebrew society, family was the place where education
took place, especially religious education. Parents were taught to take
a primary and personal role in educating their children about life,
about God, and about faith. Family had a clear role and place in
society.
In our society, family is at best a haven of love where
values are taught and nurtured. But all too often it is a place where
individuals live in shared rooms in the midst of trauma, tragedy, and
tension. Family is not necessarily a safe haven nor a place where values
are intentionally nurtured.
And it's easy to agree with Jesus that this is not where
our salvation lies. Our salvation is in a new and different
understanding of family, a new way of expressing the concept of home.
Jesus came proclaiming that God is the head of the
household and we are all children of God; brothers and sisters with one
parent. This family was not created for economic reasons, but rather to
bring meaning and purpose into our lives. It's not a fortress against
the world as much as it is a meeting point in the midst of the world.
It invites us to radically change our understanding of
family so we see each other as members of one large community of faith.
It redefines home to be that place where the family meets to strengthen
and encourage one another.
Passing on the Christian values of grace, love, and
forgiveness become our purpose as we gather together in God's house; as
we gather together in this our Christian home.
The church, then, becomes our home. It's the place where
we are loved and accepted. It is the place where we find security and a
place where we learn, teach, and practice values and virtues. Here we
are strengthened and given the resources to meet, challenge, and change
the world.
I know that this has long been true for me. During the
time I served in the Navy, the church was my home, it was where I found
my family. I found love, hope, and safety in and with church people in
Georgia, South Carolina, Connecticut, California, Illinois, and Kansas,
as well as the churches in Washington where I have lived and served,
both as a lay person and as a pastor, including this church.
When we learn to do God's will, we become the true
family of God whether or not we were related beforehand.
And I thank God for this family, for this home.
Amen.
